got back home today. and it felt good, until it started to feel bad. just seeing places and things that haven't changed, can be good. very good.
but memories crash back, primarily ones that surround my granny. and the way things used to be. and then i get panicked, get sad, get angry, get fidgty all at once. its almost a physical reaction to my surroundings. its easier when i'm not here, because i don't have to think about. don't have to see her car, the places she went, the house. the holidays. but yet i yearn to come back to see my family, i guess its kind of bittersweet.
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